Friday, October 5, 2012

Long overdue

I knew it had been a while, but had no idea that I actually haven't posted since July. That is just insane. And of course, I was putting it off because I both had no idea what to write about, and also felt like there was just too much to update at the same time. But here I am, thanks mostly to Soulshine who checked in and asked for an update...

It is hard to believe, but the J-dog will be 18 months in a few weeks. He is so much more a little boy than a baby these days. He actually started daycare at the beginning of the school year, and seems to be doing really well there, though he has been through two different colds in the past three weeks. Today was the first day in a long time that I think he actually felt ok, and we had a lovely Indian summer day together. He is really into vehicles: all trucks, buses, firetrucks, garbage trucks, street sweepers, cement trucks, and most of all, diggers. Fortunately we have a wealth of all these things to choose from in our neighborhood on any given day. And I guess there is nothing unusual about this in an 18 month old boy, but I think it is pretty cute. And he can identify many different types of trucks in his truck books, pointing to the car carrier, or cement truck, etc when I ask him to show them to me.

Although he obviously has a very large receptive vocabulary (did I just make that term up?), he does not have too many actual words that he uses. He says mama, dada, meow-meow, up, door, and more. That's pretty much it for now. I'm expecting that he is just going to break out in full sentences someday soon. Some behavioral things that are annoying me are his new habits of pushing kids at the playground, and slapping me in the face. He does not respond very well to "No", and I am really trying to work on my serious, mean face to make him stop. I really loved "The Happi.est Bab.y on the Bloc.k" when he was tiny, but I recently bought the follow-up "Happi.est Toddl.er" and found it to be pretty silly. I have taken some of the advice, but really don't see the reason for,necessity of, speaking to him in "toddl.erese" when I'm trying to get him to speak in the first place. I guess that's the linguist in me - I only want to model correct language for him. So, I'm looking for some good suggestions for disciplining and preventing temper tantrums without treating him like a mini-Tarzan.

In terms of daycare, he was originally going the two days a week that I teach, but we added a third day when I am not at work so I can do prep work and house work at home. It has been the first time that I have had a whole day to myself to do things for myself, and though I was feeling guilty about it at first, it has been great. And totally worth the money. So, what else do I need to catch you all up on? I am back at work obviously, as the new semester started over a month ago. I do enjoy my teaching, but wish that I didn't have such a long commute. Coming home at the end of a very long day is grueling, especially when I know that I will only have about 20 minutes with the J-dog before he has to go to bed. And if I have a meeting after classes are over, then I don't get to see him at all. J picks up all the slack on my work days, both dropping the J-dog off and picking him up, as well as feeding him breakfast, getting him ready and out the door, and feeding him dinner too. So while I don't get much time with him on those two days, I am home with him on two other week days when I have him all to myself. I do consider myself lucky.

I have some other blog posts in my mind that I have been wanting to write for a while now, about how I am feeling about being a mother and a survivor of IF. I will try to get to those soon, before I am stuck having to write another long update. In the meantime, Soulshine asked for a picture, so here are a couple, riding his squirrel scooter with his new shoes on, playing with Daddy's shoes and snuggling a very tolerant kitty:

11 comments:

  1. Our lives have so many similarities--on the three days a week that I work I see the kiddos in the morning from 6-6:30 and then afternoon from 5:30-7:00 and it feels super short (but I love my job and fathom not working). My hubs picks up the slack on the days I run late or have a meeting etc and it's great. I think that day to yourself to do all the other things that need getting done sounds DIVINE. I wish I could figure a way to do that but alas it won't happen any time soon :)

    As far as the words--they will come. Our son just started a language explosion at 19 months and we are amazed every day what he says. Our daughter isn't far behind and we can't even count the words they can say. It's amazing to watch.

    Tantrums--luckily our son doesn't do this but whoa boy does our daughter. We are having a really hard time with it. She seems to be 'set off' pretty easily. Our best tactic is ignoring it and thus not giving her any audience for her behaviour. It often means we literally walk out of the room where she is and if she follows us still squawking and pulling on me I will say "I will not pick you up when you are behaving that way." Sometimes we have to isolate her in a time out chair until she calms down...which she eventually does. We're hoping it passes soon...ack.

    Well, didn't mean to hijack your comments section! Glad to see you posting again :) We are planning a trip to your lovely city but not for a few months...can't wait though!

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  2. cassie!
    thanks so much for your update and those pics!
    the pics- what a head of hair he has! its so thick and healthy looking... has he had numerous haircuts by now? bubba's hair is fine and curly, and i have not the heart to cut it yet (at 26m old!). also, your house looks like a toddler lives there :) lol! a beautiful thing, something we all waited for- toddler chaos. and, lastly, look at that kitty's expression! too funny. love the pictures! they say so much without revealing anything!

    daycare! why does it get such a bad rap?! bub goes 3 days, and he also started in september. wow, what a difference it has made, in his language, cognitive stuff, and just having some little peers to observe and learn from (and get colds from!). it is so worth it. i don't feel any guilt or anything while he is there- free time for me feels so good, and it is usually only for an hour or so in any case- so much to get done wiithout a little scattering around!

    as far as tantrums- i mean, there is not a whole lot you can do about them, in my opinion. they are just outward expressions of frustration at not being able to communicate what they need/want, or have everything they want/need. i am all about ignoring them, or distracting him before it gets too out of control. otherwise, i have no problems letting him fully express his tantrum! there is no reasoning with them in that state! when it looks like it is calming down, i sit near him and give him some love, a big hug, and tell him i love him. it does really suck, though, listening to them feel so out of control with frustration and emotions they don't even know the name for yet! everyone says that they grow out of this stage, and i look forward to that progression, lol!

    things sound great cassie- thank you so much for letting us know how things are going!
    soulshine

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  3. so good to hear from you, and to see how big the j-dog has gotten!! it sounds like you have a great set-up, and boy am I jealous of that day to yourself, that is such a nice treat!! and it sounds like j is in typical toddle mode, talking when he wants, throwing fits and generally being a toddler! all normal stuff. and the trucks- my daughter loves them too, and being in the city, we have tons of trucks, airplanes, ambulances, sirens, buses, taxis, etc for her to point out to me, in case I missed them, lol! enjoy the fall!!

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  4. Sooo great to hear from you Cassie!!! LN10 loves his little toy cars too. Hope the toddler trials get easier...yikes! Things to look forward to.

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  5. He's SO cute! So glad he is enjoying daycare and that life is good. :)

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  6. What a great update, Cassie. Thanks for letting us know what's going on. Sounds like life is very full these days. Long commutes are soul crushing, and I can imagine that when it means time away from your toddler, it's even worse.
    How great that you can now have a full day to yourself for prep and perhaps self-care (does that even happen after one becomes a mother?).
    The pictures of your boy are adorable. thanks for sharing.

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  7. So sweet! The boys want a dog, but I deal with enough poop! They also like trucks and love the school bus. They get excited when they pass our house several times each day! Very jealous you get some time for yourself. I hardly get out!

    T

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  8. Your boy is beautiful! I love reading beautiful conception successes like these. Makes me so proud to provide testing products for women struggling with infertility. http://etegritytest.com

    Thanks Cassie!
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  9. Your males require a dog, but I deal with ample feces! In addition they just like trucks along with enjoy the teachers tour bus. They will obtain fired up once they cross home repeatedly every day! Quite jealous you receive a while by yourself. I rarely move out!
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